Now it’s the end of the year, and nothing left to do but write.

This afternoon I just finished “Libra” for Air. The publisher would like Air for the end of the year. This means I need to write a lot more quickly than usual.

When I need to write quickly, I plot it out. I use index cards, real live paper index cards, not virtual ones. I put the title of the piece in the left hand corner, in this case, the symbol for Libra, POV is Point of view. SH means the Sheriff, the main character. SC is the scene number, in this case, 3.

Next I write the setting I need to establish. Then in three or less sentences I summarize the scene. This is based on Holly Lisle’s “How to Revise Your Novel” online class which is not worth the $300 to spend on it when you can get a few other “How to Revise Your Novel” books for $14.99. But Holly’s course is actually fun if you’re like me, and like to deconstruct your novel over and over. I used it for the first Grimaulkin book, which unlocked a few ideas. I also used it for War Mage, twice, and it didn’t work.

This gives me enough space to do the actual writing without giving away the details. Because the fun of writing for me is coming up with the details, the plot cards only guide me. This way I don’t meander, waffle, or get distracted. I can get the writing done.

So hopefully Air will be done in 3 weeks. I’ve done most of “Gemini” (I need to add more sex scenes, to tell you the truth). I’m having trouble with “Aquarius”. Need to do research on him. Was going to do the “Summer of Love” but there was a lot of darkness then, too. After all, Charles Manson came up through the ranks at Berkeley. 

HIT:
At the Rhode Island Expo, I sold ten books. I was happy and excited, because I got to meet a real fan who read my books (the erotica series) and loved them. I also met two people who traveled from the northern part of the state just to come get my books (and another LBGTQ fantasy author). In RI, being such a small state, that’s a big thing. I also sold a few War Mages for the card reading aspect.

MISS:
I ended NaNoWriMo with 9500 words to go. The more words I added, the more stupid the whole thing started to sound. I knew I had to go back to the beginning and introduce Nash instead of introducing him in the middle. And I didn’t take note of the timing because I knew that Nash had to reappear on Thursday or Friday night – but I didn’t know where I wrote Thursday or Friday night. I started to re-read, and realized the entire first scene was a throw-away…so I gave up.

But the important thing is that I got a story out. Any words is better than no words, and now that I have something to work with, I can take care of things on the second pass. I’m going to let it rest for about a month, while I write one of the Air stories, and then get right back to it.

Here are my goals for 2019:

Brothers of the Zodiac: Air – Spring 2019
Grimaulkin in the Wild – (an anthology of backstories for Grimaulkin) Spring-summer 2019
Blood From a Stone – Fall 2019. That one needs a lot of TLC because it is really a hot mess. Max may end up telling this one.
Yellowtree – Summer 2019 Once I make it pretty.
Futhark (tentative title) – a standalone erotica story by Max – Unknown when.

So,finally started NaNoWriMo four days behind. On Saturday morning, I had 6K words. As of right now, I have 14.5K words. Not bad.

My waking up at five this morning did not help with writing at all, as I ended up passing out throughout the day in front of my computer, creating only 2200 words as of this writing.

I am afraid, as I always am, that the story itself will be too short for a novel. I looked up my subplots. One of my characters is not doing what I want him to do; one subplot hasn’t even been introduced; one subplot is barely mentioned. There’s flashbacks  and dream sequences that I hate using, but are necessary for the story. 

My friend asked me what it’s about. When I tried to explain that I can’t explain it right now, she didn’t understand. Non-creatives don’t get that when we’re in the thick of creating, we can’t explain what we’re doing or how we’re doing it. Sometimes we can’t explain it even afterward. 

I just hate being around non-creatives. They don’t get that we need the time, the space, the ability to create, and sometimes creating is a sacred and necessary act. I’m sorry, but I’d rather spend my weekends working on a novel than watching endless games of football. Or I’d rather use my imagination to create my own story rather than have it spoon-fed to me on a TV screen.

And I don’t do this for the money, Gods know. I do this because I have a story to tell, and I want you to see it or hear it or know what it is. I realized that the money is icing on the cake, like when I read cards. It’s an exchange of energy, one thing for another.

I used to  read cards for free, and I prefer to do that even now. But I’ve learned since that card-reading is a service that people are willing to pay for. I don’t charge an arm and a leg for it; I try to keep things cheap because, again, I have a story to tell you about yourself and I want you to know it.

Why do I create? Because the muses tell me to. And they are far more interesting than any of the stuff on air, because it’s mine.

So, I’m feeling much better than I was last week. It seems this week has been pretty good healthwise (Knock on Formica).

Fire’s final proof got sent back to the editor with a few corrections, so that’s expected to be out in October. Also in October will be “War Mage”. I will also be at the Autumnfest for three days in Woonsocket, RI. I don’t expect to sell lots of books there, but I expect to have good food.

I’m working on Air, to be ready for February of next year. After that, I have no idea what to do. Blood From a Stone might be something, but that’s a stand-alone murder mystery. After that…no idea. Well, I do have an idea for continuing with Grimaulkin, either adventures he has on his own or adventures he has with Ash, his nephew. There’s also an idea of an anthology for other Grimaulkin characters, like how Aunt Jane died, where Ritter came from, who Cavalier really was…that’s a possibility.

I’m also going to try to enter more contests and anthologies next year. Maybe get my name out there somewhere.

Episode 14 is up and ready on the Dark Mystic Quill website. It’s about sacred space or creating a “circle”.

I was a bad girl this week. I got no writing done. I had doctors’ appointments and had to work late to make up the time. I got home, ate, and then I had my vice (news from 5-7) and by 7, I collapsed. I’ve played around with some medication so I can stay up longer than 7 and go to bed at a more reasonable hour. But this week was bad.

I know what I need to do, it’s just I need the time and the inspiration. This writing gig is hard work, especially when gripped by real life.

Is a million books sold.

Laugh with me. Go ahead.

However, that isn’t really hard. All I need to do is–put my name out there, become a YouTube or podcast star, write tons of critically acclaimed books, and voila! A million books sold.

Becoming famous is either a lightning strike or slogging through mud. The ones who slog through the mud aren’t heralded as loudly or as much as the lightning strikes. But while the lightning strikes last only a short time, the ones who slog last forever. I suppose I would rather be one who slogs. But most of my fame will be posthumous, I guess.

Next blog I will reflect on the year and give you an update of what’s coming up for next year. My Goodreads giveaway was a success–over 600 people entered the sweepstakes and about 10% of them put my book on their to-read list. I sent out the winner with Thursday’s mail. I think in February I’ll do another giveaway, with books 1 and 2 along with “Self-Defense”.

“Virgo” just had its big reveal…at 6K words. I’m at the point of “Now what?” I guess I’ll throw in an explosion, because I have about 25K words to go. I’ve been thinking about Capricorn and might sit down to write that one instead of Virgo, and let Virgo sit for a little while. Not sure. Taurus I need to do some research for. Queer Romance Ink, here I come.

I had the best spot at the Author Expo. First row. People saw me when they first came in and took a left from the entrance.

I sold 8 books, the most I’ve ever done. Most of them were bundles. I’m going to try and do the bundles from now on. They were a really good draw.

Grimaulkin Tempted went well, also. Sold five over the course of the week (both at the Expo and to people at work). At the Expo, I had two people who actually came there looking for me! I have fans! (Welcome if you’re new here.)

I’m right now working on Earth. Virgo, in particular. I hope to have that done this month.  Then there’s Capricorn and Taurus. Then…War Mage. After that, Grimaulkin 3 (Grimaulkin Redeemed).

I have a busy year coming up. I’ll also be at WorldCon in San Jose from August 15-20–planning on buying my tickets this week for the flight. Although I’m not nominated for any awards, I plan on being there with Paper Angel Press to sign books and to help at the booth.  I’m excited and nervous at the same time. It’s my first big Con.

Episode 11 may come out next weekend for Dark Mystic Quill. At least that’s what I’m aiming for. It will be about witchy stuff, since I haven’t been doing much of that lately.

I just finished Grimaulkin Tempted this morning at 9 a.m. Now I need to kick back, celebrate, and let it rest.

Next Saturday I’ll be at the Narragansett Calamari Festival (alone…my assistant bailed on me yet again). Next Sunday will be rewrite day.

So next on my bucket list is Earth. Virgo is the one that’s calling me right now, so I’ll work on that.  We also got an audition for Water‘s audiobook.

Podcast 7 to drop tomorrow, once I figure out what to talk about.

Yes, I survived. But not as I had hoped.

I hoped to sell a lot of items for the Press. Building Baby Brother and Best Intentions. Unfortunately, nothing sold except 4 copies of my book, Homecoming. I have a feeling if War Mage was available, then things would have been more brisk.

If I do this again, I need more books of my own to sell. Next year, I hope to have 3 books: Homecoming, War Mage, and Grimaulkin.

I gave up on NaNoWriMo this year. The story just isn’t in me. I’m itching to edit Grimaulkin instead. My plan is to get Grim in the publisher’s hands by February of next year, and hopefully have it ready to go by November again.

Maybe I’ll do the Con again. I’ll have to come up with the table fee, which is insane.So far what I’ve put out in table fees is way more than what I’ve made.

Military speculative fiction is a very tight niche. I might have written War Mage for a too-tight audience. Grimaulkin is more general. Mercedes Lackey did okay with her gay mage; I don’t see how I can’t do well with Grim

When I first started writing, I wrote primarily for myself. Success was getting the words out on paper, by pen or typewriter. Then I started posting stories with other people in forums and a blog. People liked my characters and their stories. People commented, which meant they read my stuff. Someone else actually liked what I was doing!

My level of success changed. It was to get published. Because of my fear, I sent out four, exactly four, query letters to different agents. All of them said no thanks.

Then Paper Angel came along. They offered to publish a book it took me a month to write and was my most recent novel (therefore, the one I was most passionate about), Homecoming. I’m working on War Mage, the actual novel, since Homecoming is more or less a prequel.  I have another novel that I’ve been passionate about for the last three years that I hope to get to Paper Angel. This meant I fulfilled my dream of getting published, therefore I’m successful.

Not so much. Because I raised the bar yet again. I had goals: 20 reviews and sell 50 copies in three months, being on the best seller list, whatever that means…but then reality burst that bubble (so far).

However, people who’ve contacted me about my book say it’s a good beginning. They want more. They like the character, the world I’ve created, the setup for the next book. In fact, one of my readers said, “You’ve been writing for over 30 years; what else do you have that I don’t know about?”

What was my original measure of success? To get the words out. Not the money. Not the fame–though they would be nice. I write a story that I myself would like to read. If someone else comes along for the ride, then I have done my duty. By that, I am successful.